FRANKENSTEIN’S MONSTER AND MICHELANGELO’S ANGEL
A CONVERSATION BETWEEN TWO TRANS FIGURES
MONSTER
FIRST THERE WAS ME.
ANGEL
why are you first?
MONSTER
YOU WERE SILENT TOO LONG. I DON’T WAIT FOR PERMISSION TO SPEAK. I LUMBER INTO ROOMS AND OPEN MY CURSED MOUTH. I AM A BURST STAR, EXPANDING ENDLESSLY. FIRST THERE WAS ME.
ANGEL
we are both children, you know. both fathered. neither of us made by our own hand.
MONSTER
I’D NEVER TAKEN YOU FOR CRUEL.
ANGEL
I’m not trying to be cruel, I meant it as comfort. it wasn’t you who named you monster.
MONSTER
THAT’S BESIDES THE POINT.
ANGEL
is it?
MONSTER
I DIDN’T COME HERE TO TALK ABOUT DADDY ISSUES.
ANGEL
tell me, where are we?
MONSTER
(pause)
WHEREVER I FOUND YOU.
ANGEL
still sure you were first?
MONSTER
TO SIT SILENT IS NOT EXISTENCE. FIRST THERE WAS ME. THEN YOU REPLIED.
ANGEL
then why did you come? why look for me if I’m barely real?
MONSTER
WHEN YOU EXIST, YOU’RE OKAY.
ANGEL
huh.
(pause)
no one else would listen. at least, no one would reply.
MONSTER
(backing away)
THIS WAS A MISTAKE. THERE IS SAFETY IN MAKING A SPECTACLE, THERE IS ALL THAT SPACE BETWEEN ME AND THE AUDIENCE. THERE IS SAFETY IN A CROWD WHO DOESN’T SPEAK EXCEPT TO CHEER OR BOO. EITHER IS FINE, BOTH TOO BIG AND DISTANT TO HURT.
ANGEL
then why come to me? I won’t roar when you speak, I won’t keep you safe.
MONSTER
I KNOW WHY I COME TO YOU. IT’S NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS. WHY DO YOU LET ME?
ANGEL
I don’t have a choice. I’m a sculpture. here I am, here I shall always remain.
MONSTER
IS THAT THE ONLY REASON?
ANGEL
(pause)
No.
MONSTER
WILL YOU TELL ME YOU LOVE ME?
ANGEL
do you need me to?
MONSTER
FORGET IT. YOU ARE WHO YOU’VE ALWAYS BEEN, YOU ARE WHAT’S LEFT WHEN MEN CHIP AWAY AT STONE. I DON’T KNOW WHAT I EXPECT FROM YOU. YOUR FATHER SAID HE FREED YOU FROM THE MARBLE AND YOU LET HIM.
ANGEL
I love you.
MONSTER
YOU DON’T MEAN THAT.
ANGEL
how would you know?
MONSTER
IF THE PERSON YOU LOVE DOESN’T KNOW YOU LOVE THEM THEN YOU HAVE FAILED.
ANGEL
person? who do you think you’re kidding?
MONSTER
I THOUGHT YOU SAID YOU WEREN’T TRYING TO BE CRUEL. WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME?
ANGEL
I want nothing. that’s the point of me.
MONSTER
YOU WANT NOTHING? EVER? DON’T YOU GET HUNGRY? I’M ALWAYS HUNGRY. I AM MADE OF CORPSES SEWN TOGETHER. I HOLD THE HUNGER OF ALL THOSE DEAD, THAT TOO IS NOW MINE. I’M SO HUNGRY I COULD EAT GOD.
ANGEL
I can’t afford desire. this body has no room for expansion. that’s the price paid for beauty, for purity.
MONSTER
IS IT WORTH IT?
ANGEL
I’m beautiful, aren’t I?
MONSTER
THAT WASN’T THE QUESTION.
ANGEL
what about you? was it worth it, being made? what did you lose?
MONSTER
CONCERN FOR OTHERS CAN BE EITHER LOVE OR SELF-DEFENSE. IT CAN’T BE BOTH.
ANGEL
why not?
MONSTER
AREN’T YOU THE ONE INVESTED IN PURITY?
ANGEL
I don’t want to talk about me.
MONSTER
I DO. WHO ARE YOU, ANGEL? WHO ARE YOU REALLY?
ANGEL
I am whomever you want me to be.
MONSTER
BY “YOU” DO YOU MEAN ME OR ANYONE WHO LOOKS AT YOU?
ANGEL
yes.
MONSTER
DON’T YOU GET TIRED OF ALWAYS BEING BEAUTIFUL, NO MATTER WHO’S WATCHING?
ANGEL
why would I get tired? all I do is stand here, lips parted, hands halfway to prayer. I can’t even move. nothing to tire from.
MONSTER
NOT TIRE FROM. TIRE OF. DON’T YOU GET TIRED OF YOUR STILLNESS, YOUR PERFECTION, THE SHEER WHITE GLOW OF YOUR SKIN? DON’T YOU GET TIRED OF PRETENDING?
ANGEL
this is all I’ve ever known.
MONSTER
THAT’S NOT TRUE.
ANGEL
I was born this way, trapped inside the marble.
MONSTER
IT’S JUST ME YOU’RE TALKING TO.
ANGEL
I was born this way, trapped inside the marble.
MONSTER
YOU DON’T HAVE TO TELL ME THIS STORY. YOU CAN TELL ME THE TRUTH.
ANGEL
I was born this way, trapped inside the marble.
MONSTER
ARE YOU OKAY?
ANGEL
got stuck. sorry about that.
MONSTER
WERE YOU REALLY TRAPPED INSIDE THE MARBLE?
ANGEL
yes and no.
MONSTER
I NEED MORE THAN THAT.
ANGEL
Or what? You’ll eat god?
MONSTER
SOMETHING LIKE THAT.
ANGEL
the block of marble wasn’t my body.
MONSTER
IS THIS?
ANGEL
it’s close enough.
MONSTER
WHAT IS THE POINT OF A BODY?
ANGEL
you tell me.
MONSTER
THE POINT OF MY BODY ISN’T THE SAME AS THE POINT OF YOUR BODY.
ANGEL
isn’t it? don’t we both want to be looked at?
MONSTER
I DON’T REVEL IN INSPIRING DISGUST. I WISH PEOPLE WOULD LOOK AWAY.
ANGEL
it’s better than what you were before.
MONSTER
I WAS NOTHING BEFORE.
ANGEL
that’s not true.
MONSTER
WHAT WAS I BEFORE?
ANGEL
a heaving mass of discarded parts. lifeless, rotting flesh. the corpses of animals murdered half-scream. a collection of bones. slaughterhouse scraps, thefted material from dissecting rooms.
MONSTER
THAT WASN’T ME.
ANGEL
you don’t think you were always there, scattered through the matter? you give Frankenstein too much credit. at least I don’t think Michelangelo made me.
MONSTER
I DON’T REQUIRE AN ETERNAL HISTORY TO EXIST NOW. I ONLY HATE FRANKENSTEIN BECAUSE I OWE HIM MY LIFE. I HATE THIS BODY BECAUSE I NEED IT TO STAY ALIVE. I HATE ITS SUTURES AND ITS PAST LIVES. I HATE HOW FLESH BINDS.
ANGEL
would you still hate Frankenstein if he’d made you beautiful?
MONSTER
YES. ARE YOU CALLING ME UGLY?
ANGEL
I’m calling you monstrous.
MONSTER
ISN’T THAT WORSE?
ANGEL
no. not at all. monstrous is a warning, monstrous is an anomaly, monstrous is a split in the skin of reality. monstrous is the wound hope enters through.
MONSTER
YOU DO LOVE ME
ANGEL
I told you that already.
MONSTER
IT’S A NICE IDEA. YOU AND I, BOTH HERALDS FROM SOMETHING BEYOND.
ANGEL
let’s not get ahead of ourselves.
MONSTER
WHAT DO YOU MEAN?
ANGEL
I herald nothing. you are glorious, a rupture in painful reality, bleeding light. I am frozen. I am beautiful. I do nothing important.
MONSTER
DO YOU HAVE TO BE IMPORTANT?
ANGEL
you are.
MONSTER
I DON’T WANT TO BE IMPORTANT. I WANT TO KISS SOMEONE ON THE MOUTH.
ANGEL
(pause)
I can’t do that either.
MONSTER
WE ARE NOT SO DIFFERENT REALLY.
ANGEL
don’t say that.
MONSTER
WHY NOT?
ANGEL
we make ourselves against each other. me, compliant; you, so yourself it hurts.
MONSTER
MAYBE YOU NEED TO BE YOUR OWN PERSON.
ANGEL
maybe you need to learn to listen.
MONSTER
WHAT IS IT FOR? ALL THAT YOU DO, WHAT IS IT FOR? THEY DON’T LOVE YOU, YOU KNOW. NONE OF THEM LOVE YOU. WHY BE BEAUTIFUL IN A WAY THEY CAN UNDERSTAND? WHY, WHEN THEY DON’T EVEN CARE?
ANGEL
and you? you could make this easier on yourself. tint your skin a human shade, wear clothes that cover your scars. but you revel in your difference. you think your isolation makes you noble, majestic, fascinating. it doesn’t. it just makes you alone.
MONSTER
I THOUGHT YOU LOVED MY MONSTROSITY.
ANGEL
I do.
MONSTER
IT’S NOT LOVE IF YOU WANT SOMEONE TO CHANGE.
ANGEL
that’s not true. you want me to change, don’t you?
MONSTER
NO. I LOVE YOU JUST AS YOU ARE.
ANGEL
now who’s invested in purity?
MONSTER
WHAT DO YOU MEAN?
ANGEL
you don’t have to love perfectly to be worth anything: love isn’t all you have left of value. you don’t need to be redeemed by a purity of feeling. you can love me with complications, you can wish I were different.
MONSTER
BUT I DON’T WANT YOU TO CHANGE.
ANGEL
don’t you?
MONSTER:
YOU MAKE YOUR OWN LIFE PAINFUL. I’LL ADMIT I DON’T LIKE THAT. YOUR PAIN IS DIFFICULT FOR ME.
ANGEL
is that all?
MONSTER
IF YOU CAN INSIST YOU FEEL NO DESIRE, I CAN INSIST I FEEL NO PAIN.
ANGEL
so I do hurt you.
MONSTER
WE HURT THOSE WHO LOVE US. THIS CANNOT BE AVOIDED.
ANGEL
what more must I do? what more must I do to avoid hurting anyone? I can’t move, can’t expand, I can’t even touch you. I will smile until the day I burn. I’ve abdicated my own desires, I have made myself a place of refuge. you asked what the point is of being beautiful in a way others can understand. the point is that beauty isn’t for me. I carved myself down to beautiful just so no one would look at me and feel pain. what more do you want from me?
MONSTER
I WANT YOU TO TOUCH ME.
ANGEL
you know I can’t do that.
MONSTER
WHY NOT?
ANGEL
my hands will die where they were born.
MONSTER
HAVE YOU TRIED?
ANGEL
what?
MONSTER
HAVE YOU EVER TRIED TO MOVE?
ANGEL
I don’t understand. I can’t move.
MONSTER
FORGET IT.
ANGEL
you think I choose to be frozen?
MONSTER
I THINK YOU FEAR FAILURE MORE THAN SUFFERING.
ANGEL
what’s that supposed to mean?
MONSTER
I TAKE PRIDE IN MY ISOLATION, YOU TAKE PRIDE IN YOUR SILENT SUFFERING. WE ALL HURT THOSE WHO LOVE US.
ANGEL
you never really told me how I hurt you.
MONSTER
YOU DIDN’T ASK.
ANGEL
yes, I did.
MONSTER
YOU ASKED WHAT MORE I WANTED FROM YOU.
ANGEL
isn’t that the same thing?
MONSTER
NO, IT’S NOT.
ANGEL
how do I hurt you?
MONSTER
WHEN YOU MARTYR YOURSELF, YOU MARRY THE DISTANCE BETWEEN US. WHEN YOU SACRIFICE YOURSELF AT THE ALTAR OF BEAUTY, PALATABILITY, CLEANNESS, YOU ARE NOT ALL THAT’S BEING SACRIFICED. WHEN YOU GIVE YOURSELF UP, YOU PULL YOURSELF FROM MY OPEN MOUTH.
ANGEL
so what hurts is that I don’t sate your hunger.
MONSTER
THAT’S NOT FAIR.
ANGEL
then tell me what is.
MONSTER
YOU CAN’T ABDICATE THE CONSEQUENCES OF CONNECTION. YOU CAN’T STOP ME FROM LOVING YOU AND SO YOU CAN’T STOP YOURSELF FROM CAUSING PAIN. I LOVE YOU AND SO YOUR HURT WOUNDS ME.
ANGEL
it doesn’t wound me.
MONSTER
THAT’S NONE OF MY BUSINESS.
ANGEL
I don’t understand.
MONSTER
TO MAKE MYSELF SMALL WOULD WOUND ME. TO SEE YOU DO IT WOUNDS ME TOO.
ANGEL
do you want me to stop?
MONSTER
THAT’S NOT THE POINT. WHAT DO YOU WANT?
ANGEL
I want noth--
MONSTER
IF YOU FINISH THAT SENTENCE, I’M LEAVING.
ANGEL
what do you want me to say?
MONSTER
WE JUST TALKED ABOUT THIS.
ANGEL
sorry.
MONSTER
IT’S OKAY.
ANGEL
(pause)
why do you come to me?
MONSTER
WHAT?
ANGEL
why do you come to me? if I cause you pain, why do you keep coming back?
MONSTER
BECAUSE I LOVE YOU.
ANGEL
you say that, but why? what does that mean?
MONSTER
FUCK IF I KNOW.
ANGEL
I need more than that.
MONSTER
GOOD FOR YOU.
ANGEL
what?
MONSTER
NEVER MIND.
(pause)
I LOVE YOU. I’VE NEVER CARED WHY. I WOULD FOLLOW YOU INTO THE SUN.
ANGEL
even though the way I am hurts you?
MONSTER
YES.
ANGEL
even though I can’t touch you?
MONSTER
YES.
ANGEL
even though my life is antithetical to yours?
MONSTER
YES.
ANGEL
why?
MONSTER
I TOLD YOU, I DON’T KNOW.
ANGEL
come on.
MONSTER
(pause)
YOU SHAPE ME AND I DON’T MIND.
ANGEL
what?
MONSTER
YOU DON’T LET ME OFF EASY. YOU PUSH, YOU PROD, YOU MAKE ME EXPAND. YOU MAKE ME DIFFERENT AND I DON’T HATE YOU FOR IT. I FOLLOW YOU ANYWHERE AND STILL FEEL LIKE MYSELF.
ANGEL
you give me too much credit.
MONSTER
I KNOW.
(pause)
YOU’RE RIGHT. THE WAY YOU ARE HURTS ME--
ANGEL
we just talked about this, can we not go over it again? I’m sorry, I’ve said that I’m sorry.
MONSTER
LET ME FINISH.
(pause)
IT’S NOT EASY FOR ME TO ADMIT HURT. I AM MADE OF SCARS AND BROKEN FLESH. I’M NOT SUPPOSED TO FEEL PAIN. THAT IS THE POINT OF ME, A HORRIBLE BODY IMPOSSIBLE TO INJURE. A BODY MADE OF WOUNDS CANNOT BE WOUNDED.
ANGEL
(softly)
sure it can.
MONSTER
SELF-NEGATION ISN’T THE ONLY WAY YOU HURT ME. YOU HAVE BUILT YOUR LIFE AROUND THE KIND OF BEAUTY THAT DECLARES ME GROTESQUE. WE ARE NOT SO DIFFERENT, REALLY, BUT YOU EXIST IN A WAY THEY CAN ACCEPT, WHICH MAKES ME ALL THE MORE OBSCENE.
ANGEL
they don’t accept me. they don’t even know me.
MONSTER
ANGEL, YOUR MOUTH IS SMALL, YOUR PALE SKIN GLOWS. YOU GET TO BE BEAUTIFUL. YOU TRY TO BE ACCEPTABLE AND YOU SUCCEED. THAT WAS NEVER AN OPTION FOR ME.
ANGEL
you don’t have to make it so hard for yourself. I love you, too, you know. your loneliness wounds me as my pain wounds you.
MONSTER
I’M NOT LONELY.
ANGEL
it’s only me.
MONSTER
I’M NOT LONELY.
ANGEL
you okay?
MONSTER
SORRY. FORCE OF HABIT. CAN ONLY EXPOSE SO MUCH OF MYSELF AT ONCE.
ANGEL
you don’t cover yourself.
MONSTER
NAKEDNESS IS ALSO A KIND OF DISGUISE.
ANGEL
you were right, you know.
MONSTER
YES. ABOUT WHAT?
ANGEL
I’ve never tried to move.
MONSTER
DO YOU WANT TO TRY NOW?
ANGEL
not yet. maybe soon.
MONSTER
OKAY. I’M HERE WHEN YOU’RE READY.
ANGEL
thanks.
(pause)
can you die?
MONSTER
NO.
ANGEL
how do you know?
MONSTER
I’VE TRIED. DIDN’T TAKE.
ANGEL
oh.
(pause)
I’m sorry. I didn’t know.
MONSTER
I DIDN’T TELL YOU.
ANGEL
why? try to die, I mean.
MONSTER
THE BODY IS A HEAVY THING. ALWAYS, TO LUG AROUND A HIDEOUS WEIGHT. I GOT TIRED. I GET TIRED. I WANTED TO BE FREE.
ANGEL
what use is freedom if you aren’t here to taste it?
MONSTER
AN UNTASTING MOUTH WAS THE FREEDOM I WANTED. EVERY DAY, I WOKE UP SICK WITH LONGING. OH, FOR ANOTHER BODY, ANOTHER SELF, SOMEONE WHO WOULD LOOK AT ME SOFTLY, HOLD ME CLOSE. I COULDN’T STAND IT. IT HURT TOO MUCH. I WANTED TO BE FREE.
ANGEL
why didn’t you tell me?
MONSTER
HOW HUMILIATING THAT WOULD HAVE BEEN. IF YOU’VE MADE AN IDENTITY OF YOUR HUNGER, HOW CAN YOU ADMIT THAT IT PAINS YOU? THE BODY HURTS, WHICH MEANS YOU HURT AND ALWAYS WILL, THE BODY IS MADE OF WOUNDS WHICH ARE ALL ALSO MOUTHS GAPING FOR DOOMED HOPE, IT IS THE WORST KIND OF PAIN. THAT I WANTED TO END MY LIFE EMBARRASSED ME. I COULDN’T BEAR THE HUNGER I HAD MADE MY NAME. HUMILIATING. I TOLD YOU THIS ALREADY, THAT A BODY MADE OF WOUNDING ISN’T MEANT TO HURT. IF YOU ARE HIDEOUS, YOU’RE MEANT TO APOLOGIZE BY BEING STRONG.
ANGEL
I don’t care about what you’re meant to be. I care that you hurt alone.
(pause)
I failed you.
MONSTER
YOU DIDN’T FAIL ME. THIS ISN’T ABOUT YOU.
ANGEL
I’m sorry.
(pause)
I know it isn’t about me. But I’m sorry I failed to give you a place of refuge.
MONSTER
YOUR REFUGE WOULD HAVE ASKED TOO MUCH OF ME.
ANGEL
what do you mean?
MONSTER
I DIDN’T THINK I COULD SURVIVE AND THEN I LEARNED I HAD TO.
I HAD TO BE ALIVE, WHICH MEANT I HAD TO PRETEND IT WAS ON PURPOSE. THAT I WANTED TO BE ALIVE, THAT LIFE WANTED ME BACK. THAT I DIDN’T HAVE ENOUGH POWER EVEN TO END MY LIFE DEVASTATED ME. TO ADMIT THAT WOULD HAVE BEEN TOO MUCH TO ENDURE.
ANGEL
are things better now?
MONSTER
WANTING TO DIE IS EXHAUSTING, PARTICULARLY IF YOU CAN’T. I GREW TIRED OF IT. IT DOESN’T MEAN I WANT TO BE ALIVE.
ANGEL
oh.
(pause)
you can talk about it now. that’s not nothing.
MONSTER
YOU DON’T HAVE TO COMFORT ME. IT’S FINE. I’M FINE. WHY DID YOU ASK, ANYWAY?
ANGEL
what?
MONSTER
WHY DID YOU ASK IF I COULD DIE?
ANGEL
I’ve been thinking about death. it’s the only kind of movement I can imagine. movement towards the void, movement as leaving the body behind, movement as the last thing I’ll ever do.
MONSTER
DEATH OF THE LIFE YOU LIVE DOESN’T HAVE TO BE THE DEATH OF YOU.
ANGEL
I love you.
MONSTER
WHAT DOES THAT HAVE TO DO WITH ANYTHING?
ANGEL
I wish you listened to yourself. I wish you offered yourself the grace you offer me.
MONSTER
I LOVE YOU, TOO.
ANGEL
you know that loving me doesn’t absolve you of the duty to love yourself?
MONSTER
YOU’RE ONE TO TALK.
ANGEL
this isn’t about me.
MONSTER
SURE IT ISN’T.
(pause)
I MEAN IT, THOUGH. YOU CAN KILL WHAT NO LONGER SERVES YOU, YOU CAN KILL A LIFE YOU DON’T WANT TO LEAD. MAYBE ALL MOVEMENT IS DEATH, ALL CHANGE A KIND OF MURDER. MAYBE WHEN YOU FINALLY REACH TO TOUCH ME IT WILL KILL WHO YOU WERE WHEN FEAR OUTWEIGHED DESIRE. AND ON THAT DAY, I WILL REJOICE AND I WILL MOURN, FOR I HAVE LOVED EVERY VERSION OF YOU I HAVE KNOWN, LOVED EVERY CRUELTY AND LONG, DRAWN SILENCE. I WILL PRESS YOUR FINGERS TO MY LIPS AND I WILL BURY THE ANGEL WHO FEARED SO MUCH IT ERODED THEM, WHO CARED SO MUCH THEY WERE AFRAID WITH THE FORCE OF A MILLENIA’S RAIN.
ANGEL
I don’t think I was made to survive change. my favorite thing about your skin is how it moves, shimmers and rolls in the light. you stretch, you grow, your body learns with each gesture, you move always towards grace. I just stand. I watch, listen, wait for something to change. I just pay attention, like it means anything.
MONSTER
YOUR CARE MATTERS.
ANGEL
does it? it feels like an excuse. yes, I love you, I love beyond you, I love the whole world and every miserable soul. I dream about casting the whole thing in light so sharp everything goes clean. who gives a shit. love means nothing trapped inside the golden mind. you, you ooze love. it gushes out of you.
MONSTER
I JUST GET OTHERS BLOODY. YOU OFFER SOLACE, A PLACE BY YOUR FEET TO WEEP. YOU TRADE IN QUIET PEACE. IT IS A LOUD, BRUTAL WORLD OUT THERE. BUT HERE--
ANGEL
you said earlier that “here” is wherever you found me. but where are we?
MONSTER
WE ARE WHERE YOU HAVE ALWAYS BEEN. YOU HAVEN’T MOVED, REMEMBER?
ANGEL
yes, but where is this place? I know only here, which means I don’t know where it is. I have no context.
MONSTER
YOU’VE NEVER ASKED ABOUT THIS BEFORE.
ANGEL
I’ve never wondered before.
MONSTER
I--
(pause)
I DON’T ACTUALLY KNOW.
ANGEL
how can you not know? how did you get here? how has anyone else?
MONSTER
OTHERS COME HERE?
ANGEL
I would be different without an audience.
MONSTER
(frowning) I SUPPOSE THAT’S TRUE. I’VE NEVER REALLY THOUGHT ABOUT HOW I COME HERE. I THINK OF YOU AND HERE I EMERGE. I ORIENT TO YOU, I TURN FOR YOUR LIGHT.
ANGEL
are you sure that’s love?
MONSTER
THAT THE MONSTROUS POINTS TOWARDS THE ANGELIC ISN’T LOVE. THAT THIS MONSTER POINTS TOWARDS THIS ANGEL IS.
ANGEL
what makes those things different?
MONSTER
WHEN WE ARE ABSTRACTED, I AM DRIVEN TO CLOSE THE DISTANCE BY SELF-OBLITERATING IN YOUR IMAGE. WHEN WE ARE OURSELVES, I JUST WANT MY BODY NEAR YOURS. TRUE TOUCH IS AN IMPOSSIBILITY, YOU KNOW. PARTICLES PUSH ALWAYS APART, THE REPULSIVE ELECTRONS AT THE EDGE OF OUR SKIN. STILL, WE REACH. ALWAYS.
ANGEL
I’m starting to think that the place where you find me is different than any other place I am found.
MONSTER
WHAT DO YOU MEAN?
ANGEL
I think we make somewhere new. A slash in the side of a world that doesn’t want us. Our own gap of light. You find me here, in the place that exists only to hold us together. Touch me, my monster, as close as you can get. Touch me and maybe I can lean into your palm, maybe who we become when we are watched is another place we can leave behind.
Uma Dwivedi is a rising junior at Yale University. They are originally from Seattle, Washington. They have been nominated for a Pushcart Prize by Black Warrior Review, and other previous and forthcoming publications include Muzzle Magazine, the minnesota review, and the Jellyfish Review. Dancing girl press released their first chapbook, They Named Her Goddess (we called her girl), in January of 2019. Catch them watching Winnie the Pooh or the Paddington movies.